Celebrating the ideal mother

In honor of mother’s day, I thought I’d write about an article I saw in the Nigerian newspaper Weekly Trust. Around this time last year, it ran a full page article on Celebrating the Ideal Mother.

The introductory paragraph reads, “An ideal mother is one who inculcates the best of family values in her children. She also has tons of patience to put up with the childish tantrums and makes the child feel satisfied and happy without being over-indulgent. She is usually a mix of toughness and softness and that is why every mother deserves to be celebrated!”

Later in the piece it reads, “The whole day is most likely ladened with one kind of stress or the other, and they welcome it with open arms. Why? Because they are mothers and it’s what they do best, being the multi-tasking gurus that they are.”

One part I especially agreed with was towards the end. “It seems as if something spiritual happens to a mother once their baby is born. Not only does the mother receive a spiritual connection with her baby, she seems to be suddenly connected to other children besides hers.”

The article ends by advising you to call your mum and let her know how much you appreciate her as your mother. Good idea.

The Abuja airport

I had heard so many horror stories about the Abuja airport – stories of shakedowns, intimidations, requests for money, fees for bringing a laptop, problems with taxis – that I got off the plane alone rather frightened at what I’d encounter and how I’d handle it. I was relived to find a smooth and fairly-hassle free experience.

After disembarking, you get your passport stamped. There are carts available at the luggage carousel as well as porters. I was carrying less than $5,000 cash, so customs ended up being easy as well and there is no problem bringing in a personal laptop.

If you have a driver awaiting you, you’ll find him just after customs. If you are going to take a taxi, you have to walk out of the airport and about a block to the right. Make sure to take a green taxi with a number on the side. Reports of robberies come most frequently from what are called “painted” or non-official (green) taxis.

When it’s time to depart, locals told me I could arrive one hour before departure. But expats told me to leave my hotel four hours before departure, which I found was much too early. There are quite a few steps involved in departure, but it’s not so difficult. Unless you expect a lot of traffic enroute to the airport, leaving 2.5-3 hours before your flight should be sufficient. If you have a late night flight and your driver is not from Abuja, keep in mind that he may not be able to return home, since driving at night in some places is discouraged.

The steps in departure are:
1. Change any leftover money. There is a bureau de change next to a shop on the right-hand side of the airport upon entering.
2. Show your passport.
3. Go through the security machine. If you are using a porter, he will take your luggage through the machine, then will expect payment.
4. Just to the right of the security machine exit, people will take a look at your luggage.
5. Over to the left of the ticket counters, you weigh your luggage on a scale and get a slip.
6. Then you can check in and get a boarding pass
7. Finally, go through passport control and up to the waiting lounge.
8. There may be another security machine check before boarding the flight.

It sounds like a lot, but it went pretty quickly.

To use a credit card or not in Abuja

Everything I read before departure warned people not to use a credit card in Nigeria, due to the risk of fraud. But your only other option is to carry a huge wad of cash, which isn’t much easier. If you bring over $5,000, you have to declare it, which will give you extra hassles at the airport.

When I arrived, I saw credit card machines everywhere from my hotel to the small supermarkets. The Hilton had an entire row of ATMs from different banks.

I spoke with an expat who visits Nigeria frequently and who has paid for her stays at the Sheraton with a credit card without issue. A couple of tips she offered are:

• If using an ATM, aim for Standard Chartered, which are supposed to be safe
• Avoid ATMs that are on the street and unprotected
• Find out your cards anti-fraud policies. Keep an eye on transactions and notify your card if you see anything unusual
• You may want to contact your card ahead of time and let them know to expect a charge/charges from Nigeria. Otherwise, their security flags are likely to rise.
• While using a card to buy things within the country is easy, you may face difficulty in trying to purchase something online and have it shipped to Nigeria.

Taxis in Abuja

In getting around, you have three choices, from most to least expensive.

1. Hire your own driver, who will stay with you. You can ask around for recommendations. Or many of the hotel “car hires” (see below) are available for longer term use.

2. Use your hotel “car-hire.” A “drop off” – meaning a ride to a place in town is usually 1,000, but can go up to 2,000. It costs more if you want the driver to wait. When you are ready to leave, you can call the driver for another “drop off” ride. These are generally nice cars with air conditioning. But not all of the drivers are well off. Some of them rent the car from someone else on a daily basis, so they can make their living off the difference they earn doing “car hire.”

3. Hail a taxi on the street. They are almost everywhere, easy to catch, and cost 1/3 to ½ the price of car hire. But the vehicles can be in varied states of repair and you’ll enjoy the breeze from the open windows. Foreigners I met said they and their acquaintances hadn’t had any problems, as long as they took the green cabs.

As you move around town, you’ll find you like and trust some drivers more than others. Ask for their numbers if they don’t offer them. Most drivers are happy to respond to calls and will do so quickly. It’s always nice to know that a trusted person is available to come pick you up.

First impressions of Abuja

The 30-kilometer road from the airport to town is beautiful. Paved and smooth, it is lined with trees, the green contrasting with the orange-brown dirt. It is in the process of being widened, to five lines on each side, so a cloud of dust billowed over the road while workers did their jobs.

There isn’t a whole lot to see between the airport and town, but I still got the very clear feeling of being in Africa. The first thing I noticed was the soil. Something about African earth stands out to me. Perhaps because it is more visible than elsewhere, where it might be tarred over or forested. Perhaps because of the hue it takes on. Or perhaps because of the deep, rich scent. But it moves me and makes me happy to be here.

I saw a billboard urging people to Say No to Overloading vehicles. A man walked down the street carrying an old black sewing machine with a hand crank on his head. Muslim mean wore colorful long robes and pants and round, flat embroidered hats. The non-Muslims dressed spiffily, in suits, slacks, skirts and blouses. I saw fruit – mango, papaya and other items I couldn’t identify- sold in buckets at the side of the road. Peddlers offered their wares to backed up traffic.

My driver was listening to Love FM, a nice blend of music, BBC-like local news and commentary. A short sermon by a Reverend talked about fasting during Lent. I was struck by his understanding and inclusiveness. He said the Bible offers no command regarding fasting and it’s an individual choice. One who fasts should not be ostentatious about it, nor should one judge others who make a different decision. He reminded listeners that there are some who can’t get enough to eat on a daily basis and there is no reason for them to fast. It was positive, uplifting and promoted understanding of others – a contrast to the religious discourse I hear on the radio at home.

The city of Abuja seems to be made up of a lot of new buildings, separated by wide, paved roads. It doesn’t appear to be very pedestrian friendly, as the dust pervades even the city center. My driver pointed out the beautiful gold domed mosque, and the Christian church across from it. He said there are more Muslims than Christian in this area. He showed me the various government offices, most of which looked new and modern. My hotel looks out at the federal police headquarters, a massive white structure that looks more like the United Nations than an African government ministry.

My initial impressions are good – better than I expected actually – and I’m looking forward to seeing and learning more

Arrival in Abuja

I was pretty freaked out by what I’d read and heard about arriving at the airport in Abuja. More than one person reported being “shaken down” at the airport, whatever that means. I read an account in the otherwise helpful book, This House Has Fallen, about having to fight off hordes of people trying to extract money, including a customs agent who demanded $300 to “import” the author’s personal computer. I stepped off the plane feeling like I’d be fresh bait in a pond.

It wasn’t like that at all. The passport line was a little slow, but presented no problems. Everyone was in uniform, from the officials in their khaki uniforms to the luggage carriers in their lavender shirts. Not a single person approached me. I used a free cart, grabbed my bags, sailed through customs (noting a big sign on the door that said Say No to Corruption in Customs) and found my driver outside. There is nothing to be nervous about here.

A glimpse of yesterday's news in Nigeria

One great thing about traveling to Nigeria, compared to other countries I spend time in, is that the local newspapers are in English. So one can see what the local people are thinking about and understand the nuances and details I might miss in another language.

I picked up two papers in Abuja on Saturday, March 20th. Here are some of the notable stories from each:

The Weekly Trust
• Why bombings have returned to the Niger Delta
• Pythons invade two communities
• Several Muslims are missing and feared killed in Jose
• Students protested in Jos because they wanted to be able to lynch a man they thought was carrying explosives into their institute. One student was killed when police broke it up. The man thought to be carrying explosives was only carrying cell phone bags
• 18 die in a traffic accident on the way to a man taking his second wife
• A disabled woman has been living in a cart for the past 10 years
• A former minister of defense explains why he yells at officials in the ministry
• Cerebro-spinal meningitis returns to the north of the country
• A celebration of the ideal mother
• Author profile and book reviews
• Hollywood tidbits
• An opinion piece from Atlanta about Jihad Jane
• A kid’s page with puzzle, birthday greetings and a cookie recipe that uses the U.S. measurement system

The Guardian
• The student shot at the university, as well as other violence in Jos, is front-page news. But there is no mention that the dead student was trying to lynch someone.
• “Gang of Achaba Riders Roast Cab Driver in Kano Metropolis.” When a cab driver damaged the back light on a motorcycle, a group of his friends ganged up on the driver, accused him of being a thief, beat him, then set him on fire on top of his car. Under the car, with a photo of the burned out car, a female doctor writes in how horrified she was to witness that crime and that she did nothing to help. “Innocent people are killed every day, people who wake up in the morning like a majority of us with nothing in mind but how to navigate through the rought terrain of existence, feed their families, send their children to school. Even innocent children are not spared in a land where life has become so cheap. Be it in ethnic clashes, religious clashes, in maternity wards, on the road, in our homes while we sleep evil continues to flourish because good men (and women) do nothing. It is time that we think of our roles in the society and what they can do and how best we can do it.”
• A young couple with premature triplets pleads for financial assistance. They cannot afford what it costs to have them in an incubator.
• A U.S. doctor used paper clips for root canals
• In a part of Indonesia, people snack on soil
• On the cover of the Life & Style section is the former head of Administration of the University of Lagos, dressed in an African print dress, round beads and earrings and a red turban. The headline is: Kofoworola: Cool, Calm and Cute…At 60”
• An article on How to be a Successful Wife and Career Woman emphasizes spending a lot of time to look good and recommends not wasting a lot of time on meals that probably won’t be appreciated
• A woman writes how she used a razor blade to make three marks on his “manhood” while he was sleeping, and since then, he’s been faithful to her
• Two short stories
• Articles on sunglasses, high heels and luxury hotels
• Lots of business, politics and sports

I must admit, reading the newspapers on my airplane ride home made me more anxious and nervous about Nigeria than I was when I was there. Newspapers in the U.S. have that effect as well – a reminder of all the terrible and grotesque that exists, without representing the proportional amount of goodness that takes place.

Nevertheless, I liked how thick the papers were – well over 40 pages – and the mixture of news, analysis, opinion, fashion and society, announcements and even short stories. The tendency for mob violence, especially the horrible recent slaughter of women and children with machetes, scares me. But, like elsewhere, I think the majority of the people are good. Those I came across were friendly, optimistic, hardworking, intelligent and kind.